Tag Archives: neighbors

Orange you tired of Peanut Butter?

 

 

UGH!  It used to just be the little next door neighbor BOYS that would hang out in our yard, or sometimes just walk in our back door unannounced. They would always be there stalking poor Jacob every time he would carefully and oh-so-quietly slide the back door open.

And now it’s their CAT too???!  OY VEY.

Earlier in the summer, I redid our flower beds in the front of the house laid down some of the stuff that is supposed to repel the weeds and then put some nice mulch out.  It looks quite nice, if I do say so myself.

Well, apparently Peanut Butter, the cat, thinks it’s quite nice too…AS A LITTER BOX!  Not only that, but the cat seems to make himself right at home—under my car, lounging on my driveway, relaxing in my bushes or out in the yard.  I find myself getting more and more annoyed.  Dang, at least the little boys don’t take a dump in my mulch.

SIGH.

Then on Saturday afternoon, I was sitting in the front room of our house, at the computer desk, talking on the phone with my sweet friend Lisa P. (hollaaaa!). All of a sudden, I look out the window and I see him.

Caught him red handed copping a squat in the mulch around the dinky tree in my front yard!

Still on the phone, I bolt out the front door, like a raving lunatic, shouting and shoo-ing the cat in mid squat.  He runs off, of course.  I mean, wouldn’t you if some crazy person was coming at you like that?

I smile in satisfaction at my success, and then, I look up.

A couple of houses down the street, I see three of my neighbors (not the cat owners) have enjoyed the show as well.

You know I DO try to bring joy to my friends and neighbors.  SO embarrassing. Oh well.

I’m not going to lie.  I have had some ill will towards Peanut Butter in recent days.  I even consulted my friend Google on“how to keep cats out of your flower bed”.  I guess I don’t want to *really* hurt him.  But I do want him to go away.  Sadly, I am too wimpy to go to the neighbors themselves and say, “hey, your cat is a…nuisance”.  I could secretly call animal control.  But then, I’d feel all guilty.

For now, I’m just putting some orange slices out in the flower bed and around my tree.  Google told me that cats dislike citrus.

I hope Google is right.  Cause, I’d hate for something bad to happen to the kitty.

But, you didn’t hear that from me.

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Filed under Day to Day, Humor, The 'Hood

Would you like fries with that, Superman?

“Stress is an ignorant state.  It believes that everything is an emergency.”  ~Natalie Goldberg, Wild Mind

A funny thing happened Friday morning on the way to…wait, I wasn’t on the way to anywhere…I was just sitting at my desk, minding my own business (1st mistake), talking on the cellie (2nd mistake) to my dear friend Lisa.  Just chatting away about who knows what. When all of a sudden, I happened to swivel around in my swivelly desk chair only to see my neighbor’s 4 year old son standing there.  RIGHT there.  Looking at me.  In his Superman PJ’s no less…complete with cape.  HOLY COW…scared the living daylights out of me!!!  I let out a little scream and my friend must have thought something terrible had happened.  I mean, technically it WAS a home invasion, I suppose.  I was just a tad freaked out…reasonably so, doncha think?  I mean, I realize he is 4 and all, but dang!  He did TOTALLY sneak up on me.  He’s lucky I didn’t go all “MADEA” on him!  Don’t people teach their children to KNOCK???

Anyway that little face looked up at me and said, “Can you get Peanut?” (Peanut Butter is the name of their roving orange tabby kitty who likes to jump the fence and torture my Jiffy.)  I said, “Does your mama know where you are?”  He said, “I need you to get Peanut back for me.”  I realized that he was distressed because Peanut was in our yard.  So I tell him that Peanut comes to visit us from time to time and I was sure he’d jump the fence back into their yard whenever he got good and ready.  And then I escorted the young caped crusader out the back door, from whence he came. <That kid is so stinkin’ cute>  As we exited the back door, I heard his mama hollering for him to get himself back home.  I watched him scale the fence and then I walked back in the back door.  And promptly locked it behind me.  I guess that’ll teach me to leave the back door unlocked!

In other news…last night I was lying in bed watching the 11 o’clock news when I hear this story…

A Florida woman, unhappy with her drive-thru experience, calls 911, not once, but THREE TIMES, to report that the McDonald’s restaurant is out of CHICKEN NUGGETS <Seriously???>, would not give her a refund and <oh the horror!> wants to give her a substitute meal.  {I mean, who among us hasn’t had a fast food emergency?? But did WE call 911?  Noooooooo. We keep our craziness in check!}  As a result, the Po-Po were called and the woman was issued a citation for misuse of 911 services.

I don’t make this stuff up, people!!  I could NOT stop laughing.  Hubby, who was mostly asleep, kept asking me what was so funny. I was trying to tell him, but was unable due to all my snorting and crying.   He then informed me that I needed to be quiet and go to sleep.  It was so ridiculous, I just couldn’t collect myself.

What have we learned here, my friends???

A. News stations are desperate for “news” apparently.

B. The word “emergency” is a relative term.

C. People are Kay – Ray – Zay!!!!

and

D. These are the very stories that help us all feel better about ourselves.  So, KEEP ‘EM COMING!

That is all I have to say about that.

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Filed under Humor, Random Silliness, The 'Hood

Hard Labor

“If you want to kill time, try working it to death.”  ~Sam Levonson

We’re back up and at ’em this Tuesday morning after Labor Day.  Can’t say it was easy, but everyone got out the door on time. So a big “woohoo” for us.

It was a fairly low key weekend.  But I’d have to say the most eventful part of the weekend was trampoline related.  For weeks, my hubby has been saying, “we really need to get a new trampoline”.  And for weeks, my reply has been, “so stop talking about it already and go DO IT.”  Well, as you may have read in my previous blog, we had a bit of a “tramp incident” last week.  It was the proverbial straw.  On Saturday, my hubby said, “we are going to get a new trampoline today.”  My comment to my hubby was “you will not purchase a new trampoline until the dilapidated one is dismantled and disposed of.”  All I need is TWO trampolines in my tiny backyard.  I said this fully knowing it would never happen, not in one single day, anyway.  I was wrong.  Yes, you read correctly, I was wrong.  I admit it without shame.  I was glad to be wrong.  So, Saturday afternoon, the four of us got out there and dismantled that thing in about 30 minutes.  We then loaded it all in the back of Big Red and proceeded to the dump.  It’s true.  We drove straight from the dump to Sam’s Club where we purchased ourselves a new trampoline.  If Jacob didn’t love it so much, we certainly could have lived without it.  But that boy is out there EVERY day jumping and jumping and jumping.  (Now, I can’t jump like that because I would pee a little with every jump…if you’ve given birth, you will understand why.)  But that kid is a jumping fool.  So hence the need to purchase another.  We drove home with our new purchase and decided to start putting it together right away…after all, we had already been so industrious.  We were on a roll.  Riiiiiight.

The new trampoline and net enclosure both came with written instructions.  In addition there was a DVD to give you further assistance.  You’d think that would make it easier.  No.  I’d like to say that the instructions were in Chinese and that’s what took us so long to put it together, but alas, they were clearly in English.  But that thing took FOR. EVERRRR. to assemble.  We started Saturday evening around 6 PM.  We finished Sunday evening around 7 PM.  Now, we did have some breaks in there for water, food and sleep.  We also went to church on Sunday morning, but STILL.  We probably spent a grand total of 7 hours on it.  We are not morons.  My husband is an engineer.  But it was not easy or fast.  It is, however, DONE.  And the kids have really enjoyed it a lot and I am much more comfortable with this one.

Oh, and yes, the little neighbor kids have already christened it as well.

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Filed under Big Red, Day to Day, Family